Archive for » June, 2009 «

Isn’t It Lovely…

….when your child wants to make dinner and dessert?  Lovely may not be the right word.  GloriousWonderfulFantasticCool?

Well, whatever word you choose from your thesaurus, it makes it a fine, fine day indeed.  Yesterday was that day for me.

For dinner, Bonny Annie made baked potatoes and topped them with ranch dressing and real crumbled bacon.  They were really good.  But then she served these little babies for dessert….

And since I don’t know their proper name, I’m just going to be calling them Little Bits of Lusciousness.

It is really quite simple to make the Little Bits of Lusciousness.  First you will need to soften some cream cheese (one brick….I think it’s 16 oz, but I’m too lazy to verify that right now).  Put it in a bowl along with about 1/4 c. of sugar and blend.  Next you will place about a tablespoon of that mixture into pre-prepared Phyllo shells.  These were the mini ones and came in packs of 15.  Bonny Annie was able to use almost all of the mixture, and what was left is delightful if scooped out with your fingers and eaten while standing over your kitchen sink.  I don’t know this personally, but I’ve heard.  To finish, you just top the little cups with whatever fresh fruit you have on hand.  As you can see, we had blueberries, strawberries and blackberries.  We also had cherries, but these would have required pitting, so they did not make it as a topper on this occasion.

Because she has a flair for the dramatic, Bonny Annie arranged the Little Bits of Lusciousness on a pretty plate and included a lovely strawberry/fancy toothpick garnish.  Now I’m forcing her to triple this recipe and serve it on Independence Day.  That will teach her to get all fancy-smancy in my kitchen!

Now, go forth and enjoy….especially if your kids do all the work!

King of Pop Acrostic

My dad would not let me wear one white glove to a school

dance like all the other kids.  My dad didn’t care what

all the other kids were doing.  He told me this many, many

times.

I    I always have liked the video for “Beat It.”  I recently just

let my kids watch it on YouTube. They liked it too.  I think

why this song appeals to me is that it has more of a

rock feel to it with its cool guitar licks, compliments of

Eddie Van Halen.

C   Crazy….just found out yesterday that MJ was originally from

Gary, Indiana!

H   He was seriously talented.

A   And he became seriously weird.

E   Elizabeth Taylor….I never understood their friendship.  How

did they meet?  What did they talk about?  What did they

give each other for Christmas?

L   Love, love, love the duet “Say, Say, Say” he did with Paul

McCartney….and the video too!

 

 

     J   Janet, I believe, did NOT have a wardrobe malfunction during

the 2004 Super Bowl.  I know this has nothing to do with

Michael, but I was really grasping for a J.

    A  Always have wanted to know how to do the moonwalk. Always.

     C   Can someone tell me they were NOT appalled when he dangled

his baby out the window?!

         Know how I found out about his death?  My sister called me.

She always calls me when celebrities die.  She was the first

person to tell me about Heath Ledger too.  I don’t know what

it is, but Debbles is very Johnny-on-the-spot about these

celebrity deaths….and I’m glad.  I like being in-the-know.

Sold his Neverland Ranch, but I predict that place will be bigger

than Graceland someday.

Over and over and over and over and over again….that’s how

often we’re going to be seeing his music videos played now.

Just this weekend, I saw videos that I’ve never seen in my

life, and I grew up in the 80s.

No, I will not be doing similar acrostics for Farrah Fawcett, Ed

McMahon, or Billy Mays.  While one death (or life) is certainly

not more important than another, I just don’t have it in me.

Sorry.  I know you’re disappointed. 

9:00 am Photo Shoot

What do you get when you when you cross…

  • four baseball games played in 100+ degree heat,
  • several three-hour baseball practices,
  • a handful of TaeKwonDo classes,
  • summer school,
  • Vacation Bible School,
  • and one sleepover?

Anyone?  Anyone?  Hmmm…???

The answer is….

And why aren’t I passed out like that in late-morning-sleeping-in-bliss?  Because I have THIS….

Category: My Crew  Tags: , , ,  7 Comments
Tie-Dye. Groovy.

On a whim, I decided the kids and I would make some tie-dye shirts.  We decided to make them last week, so that we could make one for Big D for Father’s Day.  I need to tell you before we get too deep into this post that I had basically no idea what I was doing.  What you’re about to see yielded a lot of mistakes and near-mistakes.  If you’re hoping for a tie-dye tutorial, then you’ll probably be sorely disappointed.  If you’re hoping for some tie-dye comedy and confusion, then you’re probably in the right place.

Because we had never tie-dyed before, we bought a kit….the one pictured above.  That was Mistake Number One.  First of all, they lied about the number of shirts.  They say it makes eight, but we only got about four and half out of it, and one of them was a baby onesie.  Secondly, all the Internet instructions that I could find do not use dye in bottles.  They make a bath with the dye, which I now realize is the only way to go (I’ll sort of explain my reasoning as we go along.  Sort of.).  This particular kit comes with green, brown and black.  I was originally wanting to get one of the brighter kits, but the kids were adamant about this camouflage, which means they’re a little redneck.  Big D really, really likes his shirt, so I guess I’m glad we stuck with this color scheme, which means we’re all a little redneck.  I think we need to move to Maine.  Or Rhode Island.

First, you’ll need to wash and dry all your shirts.  Also make sure that they are 100% cotton.  I’m not sure why.  It’s just what all the directions stated.

After you’ve done that, then you can start the fun part….putting on the rubber bands for the patterns!  The kit came with some pattern instructions, but I also found and implemented some patterns that I found on-line. (I’ll include some links at the end of the post.)

I started with Cap’n Jack’s shirt.  I did the Bull’s Eye pattern for his.

For this pattern, you will lay your shirt flat and pinch up the middle, putting on the rubberbands in an arrow sort of pattern.  You will then apply the colors, alternating each section.  The end result will look something like this…

For Big D’s shirt, we decided to do a swirl pattern.  In order to do this one, first you need to mist the shirt, front and back, with a spray bottle.

Find and pinch the middle of the shirt.

Begin turning the shirt into a spiral shape, spraying more water as you go, to get the shirt into as tight of a crecsent as you can.

When you have the shirt shaped, sleeves and all, as tightly wound as possible, place a large rubberband around the outside of the shirt to hold it in place.  You can then criss-cross rubberbands across the circle with at least two rubberbands.  It should look like this…

You then can apply the dye in whatever pattern you choose.  We started with black in the center, and worked our way out with the different colors.

We were already realizing by this point that the dye was not going to make it through all the shirts, so started using it more sparingly, not attempting to compeletely saturate them.  Here’s what we ended up with….

I need to tell you here that Big D’s shirt no longer looks like this because of Mistake Number Two.  In a later step, I put the shirts in the dryer when they were still a bit damp and the result was muddying the white parts.  Because we were using camoflauge colors, this worked out alright for us, but if you want to have some white on your shirts, you need to air dry them completely and then iron them on a high setting.

I used another variation on my shirt and tried to do a line of several swirls.  Basically, you follow the same instructions for the shirt above, just making smaller ones across the front of the shirt, like this….

You then wrap the rest of the shirt around this pattern as tightly as you can (although it will be a much thicker disc than just a single swirl), put on the rubberbands and apply the color as desired.  Mine turned out like this….

And why my shirt looks like it could fit on a Chicago Bear linebacker, I don’t know.  I think it must be the angle that it is being held, because while I am not as small as I’d like, I am NOT the size of an NFL player.

While the kids were making the designs for their shirts, I made Mistake Number Three, which was not taking enough photographs to properly demonstrate what they were doing.

Annaleigh sort of mashed her shirt into vertical folds, placed the rubberbands along the entire length and applied the color between the bands.  A large fight ensued at this point because she discovered that Harrison empited the brown bottle on his shirt before she had a chance to use much of it.  Let’s just say that it’s a scary moment when your children fight with bottles of permanent dye in their hands while in the middle of your dining room.  We finally worked out the disagreement, and this is what she ended up with…

Bonny Annie was actually happier with hers after the dryer mistake because it kinda covered up the larger portions of white and made it look less like an inkblot test. The large plains of white were a stark reminder for her of her brother’s selfishness with the brown bottle.

Dirty Harry wanted to go for a sort of checkered look.  You accomplish this by folding your shirt like you would a paper fan, long vertical folds, back and forth.  You then do the same thing with the long strip you have, until it makes a cube shape (I realize that pictures would be nice here…sorry!)  This is the best I can do….

As you can kind of see, after making the cube, he put two rubberbands around the shirt to make a cross pattern.  He applied a different color to each half, and came out with this….

He also likes his shirt better after the dryer incident.  He was a little miffed that he couldn’t apply more green because I had used most of it.  Only proceed with this project if you have strong family ties.

After all the dye is applied to the shirts, wrap each of them with plastic wrap and allow them to sit, outside in the sun, if possible for a few hours.

Then you will need to rinse each shirt with a garden hose, until the water runs almost clear.  Allow them to air dry completely. Then iron each shirt at high setting. Or if you happen to be impatient rednecks like us and want camoflauge shirts, stick them in the dryer when they are still damp.   For the first few washes, you will want to wash them separately from your regular colored laundry.

Again, I would stress not buying a kit that comes with the bottles like we used.  If you make a dye bath and let the shirts soak in them, your dye will go farther and better saturate your pieces.  Your children will also not shoot dirty looks at each other for the rest of the afternoon.  Although there are some looks that might work better with the bottles….generally those not requiring the rubberbands, like free hand designs or scrunched designs.

Here are a few links that I found helpful….

Basic instructions:  http://www.dharmatrading.com/tie-dye/instructions.html

Video:  http://www.ehow.com/videos-on_5036_tie-dye-shirt-designs.html

Patterns:  http://www.ritdye.com/Tie-Dye+Patterns.17.lasso

Let me know if you try this!  I’d love to hear about your experiences and see some pictures….especially if your kids end up duking it out.  It will make me feel better.  Thanks.

Have a groovy time!

 

Category: My Crew, crafts  7 Comments
Crazy Love Winner

We have a winner!

But first, allow me to thank you all for entering my first “The Pirate Mom Dot Com” contest.  Thanks for posting the contest on your Facebook pages and blogs.  Thanks for all the encouraging comments.  I was pleased and gratified that so many of you wanted a copy of this book.  Some even let me know that they didn’t enter, but went straight to the website and ordered a copy.  I hope that all of you losers out there go and buy your own copies of this worthwhile book.  Wait….that didn’t come out just right….but I think you know what I mean.

Okay, so now onto business….

Many of you were allowed two entries since you posted about the contest elsewhere, so I thought that the folded-paper-in-the-hat-method would work the best.

Now, if you will please tilt your heads to the left, you can watch a brief video of the exciting drawing….

 

Please excuse the sideways video-shooting.  I…ahem…did it on purpose like that for…ahem…visual interest.

Congratulations, Corey!  Please send me your mailing address at kellie@thepiratemom.com , and I’ll send your book out very shortly.

Summer School

I never gave much thought to summer school when I was growing up. 

When I was younger, it was the place where the bad kids had to go.  When I was older, it was the place where the bad boys that looked like members of the band RATT had to go.  You know…the ones who sat at the back of your English class, wearing sunglasses and ripped jeans with a pack of cigarettes in the pocket…the ones with hair longer than yours…the ones you would have dated if you could have figured out how to pull it off without your mom knowing.

Did I just say that out loud?  I should never blog using stream-of-consciousness.  It gets me in trouble.

Anyway, what I’m trying to say is that summer school was a foreign place to me.  The summers of my youth were spent playing softball and laying out on big sheets of tin foil in my backyard.

When I grew up and became a teacher, summers were spent working at a day care and crying to Big D every morning, telling him I had a stomach ache and couldn’t go into work.  He’d tell me to suck it up, get dressed and go to work.  Big D is not easily fooled.

I realize that many homeschoolers do school year-round, so summer school is commonplace, just a way of life.  Not so for us.  Oh, we’ve done a little bit through the years….some math sheets to stay sharp or a book or two that we didn’t get to, but for the most part our summers were free.

Until this year.  It was probably mid-April when I looked at my plan books, realized how much we still had to accomplish in order to be finished with 7th and 3rd grades….and I cried.  I cried hard.  The kids cried too.  We all said that we had stomach aches and couldn’t get out of bed.  Big D told us to quit our whining and get our school finished.

So that’s what we’re doing.  *sigh*  We’re almost finished with math, but we’ll have to work on history through the summer, and Harrison will have some science to catch up on.

Why are we so far behind this year, you may wonder.  It’s all his fault…

The little saboteur.

Hey Now…You’re an All-Star…Get Your Game On…Go Play

You can thank me later for getting that song stuck in your head.

Welcome to my first Flashback Friday post here on my new blog!  If you’re new to these parts, I started hosting Flashback Fridays on my old blog some time ago.  It was just a fun way to look back on my past in all of its big-haired glory.  Sometimes I’d pull up a memory from my early childhood.  Occasionally I’d focus on when one of my own children were smaller.  Just whatever form of nostalgia was tugging on my heart strings that week.

I’m not going to be hosting Flashback Fridays on The Pirate Mom Dot Com.  Hosting involved getting a link box thingamagiggy from Mr. Linky so others could post their links, and frankly, I just don’t feel like fooling with it.  Plus, I don’t think I’m going to be doing it every Friday.  However, if you ever want to post your own, by all means, do it!  You can always post your link in my comment section because, boy howdy, would I love to read your post!

Okay, so now that we’ve gotten that out of the way, let’s move on to this week’s Flashback….

All-Stars!!!

If you followed my old blog, you know that I played a lot of softball in my youth.  I loved it!  Before I discovered softball, I basically considered myself a non-athlete.  And ever since I stopped playing, I basically have considered myself a non-athlete.

So, as a basic non-athlete, I have no qualms about being completely prideful in telling you that I made the All-Star team every year I played.  For you non-softball/baseball types, All-Stars is a collection of the best players from each of the teams in a league.  The team will then practice together and go on to play in one or several tournaments throughout the rest of the summer, after the regular season is over.

Here is a shot of me and my dad back in the day…

I believe this was from 1986, and I also believe that I had the corner of the market in AquaNet hairspray.  See that little piece from my perfectly coiffed mullet that blew up from the back?  Well, the only way to achieve that was with a very hot curling iron and a lot of sprayage.

My dad usually coached my teams, and All-Stars was no exception.  Yeah, we all called him “Mr.”  No, just kidding…it stood for MenRiv, which was the Navy housing development where I lived in Charleston, SC.

Playing softball in July in Charleston was hot.  H-O-T…HOT!  Let me just say that there was a lot AquaNet running into our eyes.  Besides the heat, my one vivid memory of playing All-Stars was going to a state tournament somewhere upstate.  We had to stay over night in a hotel, but earlier that evening we all ate dinner at a pizza parlor that was located in the back parking lot of the hotel.  We were all about 13 or 14 years-old, but that didn’t stop us from flirting shamelessly with our waiter.  Apparently, one of the girls (who WAS NOT me, Dad….I swear on my can of AquaNet!!!)from our team gave him the phone number to her room.  Well, after his shift, he and a few friends tried to find her room, and what ensued was a lot of screaming, giggling girls and two dads/coaches with softball bats.  I will never forget the sight of my dad rounding the corner of the hotel balcony with my hot pink bat in his hands, yelling at the, now fleeing,  group of boys to get away from our windows.  I will also never forget the tongue-lashing he gave me in front of my teammates….even though I WAS NOT the one who encouraged that waiter.  (My dad has always thought it was me and one of my friends….but it wasn’t.  It was someone else, and in the slight chance that you’re reading this blog, you know who you are.)

The reason I bring up All-Stars this week is because we found out this past Monday night that Dirty Harry made his Little League All-Star team!

He was nominated last year but was not, ultimately, selected for the team, so we were all super-excited for him!  So far he’s having a great time even though the practices have been extremely hot this week.  But something tells me we don’t have to worry about AquaNet getting in any of their eyes…

I know that techinically this is a Flashback, but please excuse me as I flash forward and project an All-Star of 2017….

(And I mean the one with the pacifier, as I am back to my non-athleticism these days.)

Father’s Day Is This Sunday.

 

The other day we were watching a re-run of “The Cosby Show.”  Rudy was wanting to borrow some money from her dad to buy her mother a necklace for her birthday.  Dr. Huxtable, in true comic Bill Cosby fashion, was questioning his daughter about this, wanting to know why she was planning an elaborate, expensive gift for her mother when the event was about six weeks away.  He points out that on his birthday, he always gets, “Oh sorry, Dad.  I forgot.”

Poor dads.  While the kids and I were laughing hysterically at the show, there is some truth in what he was saying.  Dads do sometimes get the short end of the stick when it comes to celebrations.

And so that’s why I’m posting this today, Thursday, June 18, 2009….THREE days before Fathers’ Day.  You still have time to get your cards in the mail (if you hurry!).  You still have time to plan something special.  You definitely still have time to call your dad.  Get off the computer and do it!

That’s what I have to do.  Get off of here and go mail the cards you see above.  I don’t really like the one I made for my dad (the one on the left….Big D’s dad is a pastor, so a poker card isn’t really right for him.  My dad is an ex-Marine/retired enlisted Navy guy.  Poker is perfect for him), but I’m sending it anyway.  Because FATHER’S DAY IS IN THREE DAYS!!!  GET OFF THE COMPUTER AND DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT!!!

 

Why Clara Has a Facebook Page

 

  1. What?!  Don’t a lot of other dogs have Facebook pages?!
  2. One day Jack Henry took a three hour nap, and I was decidedly a tad bored.  Boredom is dangerous.
  3. Clara is cute.  All cute people dogs deserve Facebook pages.
  4. I thought the kids might enjoy updating her status.  However, it seems they are having a hard time coming up with things beyond unwanted details about her elimination habits.
  5. She is, as I type, eating a pencil, which obviously is her way of saying canines are ready for the computer age.
  6. She has lead poisoning and only has one week to live.
  7. I am lame.

Category: Clara-Beard  Tags: , ,  4 Comments
The Best Book You’re Probably Not Reading (and a Contest)

I’m only about half-way through this book,  and it is scaring me.  It is haunting me.  It is making me a little bit sick.  It makes me try to forget that I’m reading it.  It makes me uncomfortable.

Nice way to start a book review, eh?

Big D asked me to read this book.  He was reading it, and he wanted to discuss it.  Big D doesn’t do that much reading, but I’ll read just about anything, so I casually picked it up one afternoon and started reading.  Then my heart got stuck in my throat, and I put it down and didn’t read anymore for about a week.  I think I got a little indigestion.  Then I picked it up again, read another chapter and pretty much did the same thing.  That’s sorta been my pattern with this book.  I’m on Chapter 7.

The book is Crazy Love by Francis Chan.  It’s basically about how God loves us and how we should be loving God.  It’s about lukewarm Christianity.  It’s about lazy Christianity.  It’s about…oh…I’m not very good at this.  Here, just read the description on the back of the book…

Whoa, huh? 

My conclusion, so far, is that indeed I am missing it.  I think that’s why I don’t want to read this book but feel compelled to read it anyway.  I think that’s why I have a little bit of acid reflux every time I crack it open.  I think that’s why I suddenly want to unload the dishwasher or bathe the dog or clean out my attic when I think I should be reading it.

I need to read this book.  Deep down I don’t want to be a casual Christian.  I want to live a victorious and meaningful Christian life.  I want to please God.  And this little book has inspired me to do so.  Even if it hurts a little.  Or a lot.

Because misery loves company, I’m giving away a copy of this book.  I wish I had unlimited funds and could give away a whole case, but I don’t.  So we’ll start with one.

If you’d like a stab at the free copy, here’s what you do:  Simply leave a comment on this post indicating that you’d like to enter my contest.  That’s it.  If you’d like for me to enter your name twiceinto the drawing, then you can post about it on your blog or facebook with a link to this post.  Just let me know that you’ve done that in the comment section as well.  One week from today I’ll announce who has won and ship your book.  Easy?  Yes.  The book is a little rough going down, so I tried to make the contest easy as pie.

Good luck!


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